Adventures in Queryland Days 7,8,9: Continue living life semi-successfully.

Well, let’s see. Where’d I leave off? I feel like so much yet nothing has happened since my last post. I guess we’ll start with Ikea.


Oh, Ikea. Is it just me or are you cursed? Because there hasn’t been one time that I’ve gone into your vast wonderland of ready-to-assemble furniture and haven’t either a.) gotten into an argument with my spouse b.) found myself back in the lighting department for the third time because I tried to cheat the system and exit without using the arrows c.) been able to stop myself from hunting down a plate of meatballs even though I think they’re kind of gross.

This time, my visit was cut short because I needed to go pick up my son from school.

I mended my sick baby bird back to relatively good health so he wouldn’t miss his basketball game. He loves his BBall. Go Jayhawks!


I squeezed in a little craft time over the weekend, too.

I’ve also been been creating backstory for the characters in my next book. The series I’m working on involves Greek gods, so using what’s online (and in the multiple books I have on Greek gods) to develop personalities for them has been super fun.

My first book centered around the God of Love, Eros, and the love of his life Psyche. Their story has it all… passion, adventure, trust issues… How could I not write about that? img_0474

Another amazing love story is Apollo and Daphne. Well, more like love-hate story. Then there is crazy Dionysus and Ariadne. Jealously-filled Hera and philandering Zeus. The list goes on.

Ugh. Even if these books never get published, I don’t think I care. I’m just so driven to write them.

Anyone else out there obsessed with writing stories about the Greek gods?



Adventures in Queryland Day 6: Freak out about your MS.

Not gonna lie, most of today was spent trying not to think about what’s going on with my manuscript. Laundry didn’t help. Making a list of agents to query didn’t help. Eating the rest of my son’s Goldfish crackers didn’t even help. And I really love those things.

On top of that, my delusions of grandeur tumbled down my shirt into a pile at my feet. You know that short window of time where you think your MS will stand out because it’s different and unique and magical, with the power to stop an editor or agent in their tracks and contact you right away, because you are the exception? Yeah, well I think it’s safe to say that window is now officially closed.


I know, I know. It’s only been a week. Patience is a virtue. I’ve got to wait my turn. Pay my dues. That which doesn’t kill us only makes us… cranky as hell. I get it.

Except, the unknown is killing me. I need something big to distract myself… well, would you look at that. Brenda Drake’s 2017 Pitch Madness contest. This doesn’t seem like it would ratchet up my anxiety about having my manuscript read/judged AT ALL. Sounds perfect.

I do it to myself, don’t I? I see a grease fire and immediately throw water on it. Oy vey. Here’s to hoping tomorrow is full of better emotional mojo.


Adventures in Queryland Day 5: Bob Villa some stuff.

Today’s adventure in Queryland started with this:


But I just couldn’t even, so I sent him to school that way. Next I set to work on this:


The diverter was toast. So after two trips to Home Depot for tools I will never use again, this happened:


I was feeling like quite the badass until, oh, this happened:


Which explains how water is getting into the hell portal basement. It’s a much bigger problem than switching out a beat up old faucet, though. This, my friends, calls for a real Bob Villa. And most likely some new gutters, since our current ones clearly work worth a crap.

So yay that I was occupied all day today, but boo I have yet another thing to obsess about. I knew I should have just kept outlining.


Adventures in Queryland Day 4: Outline like a mofo.

I gave myself a full week to relax. Do other things besides write. But it didn’t work out so well. That’s right, I lasted four days before getting back on the writing bucking bronco horse.

So what did I do to occupy myself while in Queryland today? Well, I’m glad you asked. I outlined my next book.


This time around I followed Michael Hauge’s principles of story writing. I saw him speak at a conference back on January and, you guys, it was worth every penny. His philosophy made sense to me, and I wished I had discovered his method a long time ago. Like, before  I started my first book a long time ago.

His story mastery principles can be applied screenwriters and novelists alike, and his six stage plot structure is ah-mazing. It really spoke to me. It said, “Try me on the second book and see what happens. I bet you won’t regret it.”

So far, I haven’t. So far, I have a story full of plot points that is already sparking scenes in my head. Because, yes, I’d be lying if I said part of me wasn’t worried I won’t be able to write the second book…


But, I mean, look at that roadmap! It still needs work, but the story is filling out way faster than I expected. The use of index cards makes it easy to add, delete or swap plot points, and if you’re a visual person like me, see how they all connect.

Uh-oh, is there where the other shoe drops or something? Where a cartoon anvil drops on my head and bursts my bubble? I imagine I’ll find out soon enough, when I actually sit down to write it, but until then… I’m going to try and ride this high for as long as I can.

Adventures in Queryland Day 2: Stick to what you know.

Adventure #2 in 3… 2… 1…

I decided to buy myself something today. Pretty, right?




Very wrong. Incorrect, even.


Clearly, it was a mistake. I’m talking Vivianne from Pretty Woman goes back into the snooty designer boutique and buys out the whole damn store mistake. Big. Huge.


Look at that. It’s ten shade darker than the tube! In case you’re wondering, the name of the brand is Cherimoya and the color is Tulip… Beach Blanket Bingo is more like it if you ask me. Or Summer Glow Stick.

Also, it’s supposed to be a “liquid matte” lipstick, which apparently means you put it on with an applicator and then it drys like concrete three seconds later. I had to chisel it off. Seriously. My lips still hurt!

Why was I even buying lipstick anyway? It’s not like I even go anywhere fancy. Unless you consider Target fancy. On that note, somebody take my keys. The endless possibilities have gone to my head.

Tomorrow, I write. (But it’s the weekend, so I’ll probably just do laundry instead.)





Adventures in Queryland Day 1: Wonder ‘Now what?’

I did it. After almost two years of working on the manuscript for my first book, I finally queried it. As of the day before yesterday, February 1, 2017 at 3:30 pm, it is officially sitting at the bottom of an editor’s slush pile.

So. Now that I’m in Queryland, I’m not sure what to do. I’m definitely going to keep writing, but I thought I’d give myself a few days off, you know, to relax.

Or something…

200-1 copy 6.gif

Yeah, right. It was a nice thought, though, wasn’t it?

Needless to say, when I woke up this morning I was like a deer in headlights. The possibilities of doing something other than obsessing about whether my book is any good or not writing seemed endless, overwhelming even.

Should I go shopping? For clothes or makeup or shoes or other random stuff at Target I don’t need? Should I binge-watch Vikings? Read Hunger Games again? Go for a walk in the 19 degree Michigan weather? Should I finally, FINALLY, pick up the clothes from off my bedroom floor?

I went with taking a shower before three in the afternoon. Baby steps. Want to know what else I did to occupy my time? I Rosie Rivet-ed the hell out of a new shelf.

That’s right. I put together a shelf. Queryland Adventure #1 is as follows:

Upon opening the box and pulling out the instructions, I immediately found myself on a wild goose chase for a phillips-head screwdriver, a flat-head screwdriver and a hammer. It’s here I want to ask you something. Why is it, whilst needing three very specific tools, you will find a plethora of them, but never the ones you need?


Here’s what else I found during my search for said tools… A bank thingy, a 1950’s gas mask and a candlestick all walk into a bar… Wait, how the eff are these things even in my front closet?


Finally! After twenty minutes, a trip to the basement and then the garage, lo and behold, a phillips-head screwdriver.


But then I had to take a break. Because, I’ll be honest, searching for that screwdriver almost broke my will. Plus, everyone needs a little chai tea in their life. And also, I checked on my submission. Ha, ha ha… my adventures in Queryland are going to be GREAT, I tell you. JUST GREAT.


Who says putting together a 40-pound shelf is a two person job?


Voila! The result of my inner Gwyneth Paltrow is impressive, no? Well, minus matching see-through canisters, beautifully labeled wicker baskets and the conscious uncoupling from snacks. Sacrifices.


Whelp. That about covers it. My first day in Queryland. I’m sure I’ll have more adventures to share soon.  Until then…